October 28, 2011

Closing Time.... on your big dreams of fame and fortune - How the entertainment business really works


Here's something that you may have already heard, maybe not, but I definitely found interesting. Last night I attended a small reading for a memoir written by Jacob Schlicter, the drummer of the band Semisonic, called "So you want to be a Rock and Roll Star". In case you forgot (because I did) they had the song "Closing Time" a few years back that was a pretty big hit.


Eh, mostly that song just annoys the shit out of me, but like anything else as time passes and we're reminded of our days of yore, those glory days, and because we associate a song with that feeling it seems to get better to us. That's probably the only reason people don't think Bon Jovi completely sucks anymore.

But that's neither here nor there, and none of this is what I found interesting. Not at all.


After the reading Jake went on to explain how the music business works once a record label signs a band. They act like a bank, with the label paying for everything, production cost of the album, music video fees, tours, promotional products, advertising... all of it. The band itself makes money off of royalties from the album, but only AFTER the record company gets back all of the cash it shelled out in the initial investment to set the whole thing up.


Problem is, he informed us, that it costs upwards of $800 thousand dollars just to get a song on the radio. Thats not counting any of the other fees associated with getting a band to hit it big.

Semisonic sold well over a million albums, had a hit song that pretty much everyone alive at the time heard played constantly over the radio, which by anyones terms would have to be considered a huge success, right? And for all of their troubles, they made NO MONEY doing it. None. By the time the record label took back their expenses there was nothing left for the band.



And this is the same story with pretty much every aspect of the entertainment industry, whether you're a musician, writer, artist, model, whatever it is... unless you reach mega-stardom there really isn't the big fortune waiting at the end of the rainbow. The best that you can hope for is that you get to do something you love for a few years and become well known enough to open up opportunities for yourself later on down the road.


As he explained though, if you don't think that you have it in you to be that mega-star, you might as well not even bother. This is why they tell you, especially when it comes to being a writer, that if you can do anything else at all, you should do it. There's a lot of heartache, hard work for broken dreams without return on investment, and low paying gigs waiting down that road, with no promise at all for better days ahead. I'll probably be broke for the rest of my life because of it, because I'm a writer, its all I know how to do. Damn, I'd love to be a mechanic or an electrician, at least those guys make money.


So how was it that Schlicter became a writer? Well, while they were on tour he had been doing a blog, and someone he knew with connections told him how good they were and that he should put them into a book. The idea was then given to a literary agent whom Jake seemed to trust, and shopped around to various houses until it was finally picked up. The publishing company set up some promotional appearances in a few cities, and then he had to use his own cash to pay to promote the book in other places.


Here is a guy who played drums in a band that sold over a million albums, wrote a book that was picked up by a major publishing house, and he's giving free readings for small groups of about fifteen people in coffee shops in Long Island. I only went because it was down the block from me in the place I normally go to get my writing done anyway.


If that right there doesn't show you the man behind the curtain and open your eyes to how things go when people DON'T know who you are, then I really don't know what else to say to you. This is why you go to things like Comic Con and see every big comic artist in the industry set up little booths and selling prints for $10 a pop, and why flegling actors and former Playboy Playmates have to charge you for pictures you take with your own camera.... because its all a lie, a myth, and only the MOST famous, the big boys, really make the money to call the shots and stop playing the game.


For the rest, all what you really get out of it is an invitation to the party until you're too old to do it anymore. For the Playmates and models, that's about 30 years old. For the guys, its when you can't pay the bills or get those playmates and models to sleep with you anymore. Then its time to get a real job.


I didn't pick up the book, he ran out of copies (like I said, it was a REALLY small reading), but I'm thinking about it because it seemed to be very well done going by the excerpt that he read. And there it is, even for the semi-famous, those who had someone open the door for them, its still about gaining a fan or two one coffee shop at a time.


In a sense though, this makes me feel a whole lot better. The approach that we're taking in regards to what we offer young writers at The Mad Doser Presents and Gemini publishing is exactly the same as every other big company out there. Its how the industry works, so we're doing it right.


If there's an issue its with the delusions that aspiring entertainers have of "making it" and what success in this field is. Schlicter talked about how, when he was in the band, he focused on the business side of things, how many fans he had and the money they made, their fame, as the measure for success, and it sucked all of the energy (and the cool) right out of the experience. Now as a writer, he focuses more on the joy of doing it. And that HAS to be what you're in it for.... or you're DEAD!


The other day I was listening to TMCtheshow again, and they're every bit as good as anything you're going to hear on the radio. They have their format down, good characters, and they really love what they're doing. What sets shows like Opie and Anthony apart from them is the money behind it, the exposure they get with celebrity guests and spots that easily fall into their laps, and the ever important fan interaction that juices things up. But none of that has anything to do with the performers. With the right backing they'd be just as "known", I have no doubt of that. Unfortunately this is how it works.


Its our responsibility to one another to help each other out as much as humanly possible with cross promotion and whatever else it takes to push us all to that point of recognition. And then, once you've made it, to continue to help up others trying to make a name behind you as well. Have you ever noticed how often famous writers all seemed to know each other, were friends, before they became famous, and all hit that stardom at the same time? Try watching some of the BIO network shows on your favorite actors and its the same thing with them, constantly you see acting troops of young nobodies doing plays and whatnot for free... ten years later half of them are mega-stars, and guess what... they all end up doing movies together continuosly....


With that... I'm trying for ways to get big time exposure, not just for myself but for my people as well. I put it out there yesterday, but I'm now officially looking for aspiring models and actresses to be part of the Ladies of D. Its a whole involved thing that makes all the sense in the world to anyone who knows how all this works. There's a thing or two I could tell you about modelling agencies also.... but thats for another time.



Of course, people get so hooked on those big dreams they get short sighted in the here and now.... so it probably won't go anywhere..... but lets just see.

Later people.



Join my fanpage John LaSota - Writer
Or our creative team's page The Mad Doser Presents

And if you need a healthy helping hand from a Personal Performance Consultant

October 27, 2011

They're not always "Happy" Endings!

What I'm about to tell you is a cautionary tale, not meant to show you how to live your life, but like the myths of old, as a guide, a source to inform one how to navigate passed the pitfalls that await us all.


We all have our dreams, our goals, what we want to do and where we hope life will take us. But I wonder how many of you out there truly understand the delicate nature of the paths we tread, how a single fateful moment can change the course of our destiny, how far off one wrong decision can pull us from fulfillment.

Mike was a hardworking man, constructed a living from his sweat and blood, but he too wanted more. Like many of us, he hoped to one day meet the girl of his dreams, settle down, get married.


There was a deep seated desire that poured from the center of his soul to share his music with the world, get out on tour, play before packed houses in exotic locations and party it up with celebrities. Though, if it came down to it, Mike would have settled for buying a drink for his idol, his inspiration, Frank Turner, and see how crazy the night could get.


When one works hard, they party hard too; its almost a necessity, something that must be done to make it all worth it. And Mike knew how to party!

That party was at Mike's place this time around, but what's a party without the one essential ingredient.... BEER?! The days had been so long, so rough, that he hadn't had time to stop at the store. He was fresh out of the most glorious invention of all time, and soon enough his group of misfits would be descending upon his man cave full of dreams of drunken debauchery.

What was a guy to do in moments like this? He'd have to find a place to stop, pick something up, at least enough to get things going.... and then he saw it.


So often we find ourselves calling out to some higher power, some beneficial force, that when things appear to us out of thin air we choose to take them as divine events meant to save us from our plight. But sometimes, just sometimes, when something appears too good to be true, that's precisely what it is.

"Free beer with donation" the sign in the window read, as if just for him. It was a sign from God; Mike and the boys would be partying hard tonight.... and I don't mean in a soup kitchen.


"What kind of donation are you looking for?" Mike asked a tiny, decrepit old black woman behind the counter.

"Whatsa matta boy?" she answered in an accent he couldn't place, "you tink dis called The Jerk Hut fa nuttin?" And then her face gnarled into a twisted smile. "We aint be servin chicken here."

There's a major advantage in the animal world, a gift not granted to human men.


If it HAD been granted, we would never get ourselves into this sort of trouble, but then, we'd probably never leave the house either. Mike caught on to just what type of donation it was going to take when she snapped a rubber glove over her outstretched hand, pointing towards the back room with a grin.

At that moment a vision flashed in his mind at just what these drink fests could degenerate to.....


Looking around, it didn't seem as if anyone could ever find out, and here he had a guarantee. Besides, the happy ending would let him relax for the rest of the night. He'd be set, no matter what kind of sausage fest the night turned into, and none of his buddies would ever know. Who cares that she was old as dirt?

"So, uh.... what kind of beer is it?"


After two showers Mike still felt dirty, but there was just no way to cleanse his soul. Friends piled into the living room, poured into the yard, but it didn't take long to realize that things had gone desperately wrong.

"Our own special brew" is probably never an acceptable answer when asking what you're drinking from a place called "The Jerk Hut" that's giving happy endings out back. But Mike wasn't thinking clearly anymore at that point, his manhood had taken over, and what real man can turn down free beer and sexual gratification simultaneously, no matter WHAT package either came in?


When the guests began dropping like flies the horrific notion came to him.... exactly what was it tainting those beers?

Gone was the dream of tropical vacations; there would be no playing in packed houses in front of rabid crowds in far off exotic locations..... no longer was there hope of dream girls, of better days....


You just can't go swimming or get close to the ladies when you're forced to live out the rest of your days under quarantine.....

In a hazmat suit.


But don't be sad for Mike....
His time in the Jerk Hut wasn't all for naught
His donation didn't go to waste....
Man juice didn't fruit the beer; it was a certain guarantee that no one would pass that way twice which did that...

Mike's seed has been planted.
His bloodline will live on...


This is how babies are made.....

WHERE PEACOCKS DARE!

Special thanks to Mike Graci for taking up the picture challenge.

I hope I didn't disappoint.

Frank Turner kicked ass on Jimmy Kimmel Live last night.


He's so damn good. I'll be listening to his Pandora station all day today.

Beavis and Butthead reboots tonight - can't wait!

Later People!



Join my fanpage John LaSota - Writer
Or our creative team's page The Mad Doser Presents

And if you need a healthy helping hand from a Personal Performance Consultant

October 26, 2011

The picture challenge and your montage song!

Some of you may be confused by all of the Princess Leia slave girl costumes from yesterday's post; they were really loosely based on what I was talking about. If the costumes themselves were that loose the women in them would have been naked.


Most of the time I try to carefully choose the pictures that I use to enhance whatever I'm talking about, and since I've started doing it I find its a real nice form of storytelling. Beyond that, what better way to make a point; afterall, a picture is worth a thousand words.


There are times though, that for whatever reason, the mood I'm in or the story I'm telling, feels a little heavy. No one likes to be a downer, and that's certainly not what we're going for here, is it? When I'm reading one of the pieces I've prepared for you and catch that in the tone I look for something to pick it up, balance it out. It always comes back to balance, doesn't it?


While I realize that it may turn some of you off, so will crying in my cheerios, so I hope its only off putting for a bit. Besides, what can be more iconic than Princess Leia? The real reason behind choosing those pictures was simple though..... I couldn't decide which one to go with, so I used them all.


I'll have to find a creative way to make it up to the ladies, all my female fans out there (which is most of my readers, surprisingly), that makes me use nothing but pictures of dudes that won't make me sick. THAT my friends, should be interesting. BUT.... part of the entire reason behind this mess is to get those creative juices flowing, so I'll come up with something cool; its a good challenge.


I'm all for a creative challenge. I love the damn things. Often, when you're writing everyday, it can be hard to come up with good topics. And those of you who read me all the time can by now tell the difference when I'm really feeling something. With this, and even more so in my storytelling, what I use in my fiction for my books, when you're really feeling it the story just writes itself. As the writer your only job is to just let it happen. All the best things in life happen that way, don't you think?


That's probably why I enjoyed the short story book that I've been pushing so much. I think every one of those stories had been something like that.

One of the stories in that book, "A Moment", one of my favorite pieces that I've ever put down, took ten years to write. I had the idea, but it took meeting the right person and one of my worst days in life to happen in order to put it all together. From there it just flowed through me, and now because of it, one of the dearest creatures to ever touch my heart will be with me forever. Not that I needed the story for that, but I get to share her with you, which you couldn't experience otherwise.


I've got a lot of talented musician friends, and many of them tell me that for them its the same thing, the music just flows through them. Well.... I'm always looking for new ways to tap that flow.

So here's a little something different for you, a way to make things more fun, and get this spot on a whole new interactive level..... you pick the pictures and I'll write something based on them. Pick out any ten random photos that aren't porn and I'll see what I can do with them. Sent them to john@maddoser.com


In the meantime, maybe you can help me with something I've been trying to decide since WAY back to my very first post "I NEED TO FLY ON THIS ONE!". If you haven't read that one you really should. I've come a long way since then now that I decided to clean it up, but just be warned, its full of swearing and toilet humor. Actually, that's probably all it is.


Anyway.... what would your montage song be?

Every time I think of the answer a hundred songs fill my head. Most of the time I learn towards Tom Petty's "Learning to Fly" because it seems to fit where I am right now.


Though I'm really not too sure that a slower song would do, a montage should be fast and upbeat, no?

That's not where I'm at though. For a moment I thought "No Rain" would work perfectly....

"All I can say is that my life is pretty plain...."


But a montage is supposed to show you getting things done, progressing through the major stages of your life in a three minute musical mosaic.

Still, "No Rain" fits pretty well right now. Trouble is... who wants to watch a three minute clip of me sitting around doing nothing in all its various forms for six months? And sadly, right there, if anything does, that statement just about sums up my sorry state of affairs.


DAMN, I NEED A MONTAGE!

The real answer to the montage question probably lies in what you want for your life in the next few weeks or months though I suppose, if we had that choice. And since I'm stuck on Tom Petty anyway, I'm going to leave you with the montage song I'd choose, one of my favorite of all time, if mine were a love story.


Yeah.... that'd be cool.
That's what I really want.

What about you? What would be happening? What would your song be?

Later People!



Join my fanpage John LaSota - Writer
Or our creative team's page The Mad Doser Presents

And if you need a healthy helping hand from a Personal Performance Consultant

October 25, 2011

Slave Girl Princess Leia, and the balance between negative heckling and constructive criticism...

The response to yesterdays post, and all of last week, was OUTRAGEOUS! Thanks for that! Its amazing how that happens when just 1 of you shares these posts with your friends on Facebook.

One of the things that I held back from my coverage of the New York City Comic Con, the review of a book I was given for free from someone that I've seen around at a few different venues just for the purpose of the review, ends up being the perfect lead in for today.

The reason its perfect.... I just can't do it. I can't.


The book wasn't good. Sure, there were a couple of good ideas, but nothing sustainable. It just seemed like a bad rip on the old Tick comics, with a story that just didn't work. But I know how hard it is to do all that work, believe in it, put the time, money and effort into selling it... and it going no place. I just don't have the heart to tear it apart, not like I would do with multimillion dollar Hollywood productions.

The shame of it is, in terms of getting yourself out there, the creator was doing everything right. He had the nice looking booth girl getting attention, he spent the money on a nice sized booth, his table was full of different things like T-Shirts and what not.... but this is what happens when you're selling a product that's just not good.


And its situations just like this that sometimes put me at odds with a lot of the success principles that I've been learning over the passed few years. You're supposed to get as far away as you can from the naysayers. If people don't believe in what you're doing, you're not supposed to listen to them. Negative people will only drag you down, so go out there and live your dream, and all that jazz, right? Except that sometimes they're right.

There's a big difference between belittling someones dreams because you want to keep them down, or because you can't let them become more successful than you are, or whatever other reasons you can come up with, and the genuine warning that a real friend, and only a real friend, can offer.


If we're going to meet some ladies and your breath smells like my taint after a summer softball double header, its up to me to tell you about it. If you have a voice that sounds like someones skinning cats in a back alley behind a Chinese take out joint, and you're scheduled to appear on American Idol, then its my job to let you know what you're in for. If you've got a new man or woman in your life, and I've seen pictures of them online taking the hot lunch.... AND all of your friends think they're annoying and crazy and will ruin you.... guess what.....

So as much I do believe in positive thinking and perseverance, believing in what you do and all of that mess... you also have to know when you're backing the wrong horse.


Now, I could have made a splendid display a ripping this guy apart (I'm can be a real ass when I get my Irish up), just like I could have done a weeks worth of hysterical reviews of people that should never be dressed as Princess Leia in the slave outfit letting it all hang out..... but what would I really gain out of that? I'd effectively be destroying a good, though misguided, guy and his dream and given that gut wrenching twist that any of us with a conscious feels when we've hurt someone for no good reason; that sick feeling we get when we know we've done something really wrong.


Of course, I could have been a good media whore and done whatever I had to for new audience members. I could have blown this guy like a fluff girl at a gang bang so he'd tell everyone he knows how great I am.... but you all know how much I hate people that are full of it.... besides... to do so would not only cheapen the write ups I gave on the people, companies, and work that I really enjoyed... it would have cheapened everything that I have to say.

That's integrity, and its hard to keep, especially when you're up against it. But at the end of things, what else do we really have.


That doesn't mean I have to be nasty though. You know how the saying goes... if you've don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

Maybe I'm getting old. Or maybe I'm just getting soft. Possibly both. The truth is that I probably don't have a right to complain about anything bad that happens to me. If you've ever been standing on a corner on Queens Blvd and randomly got pelted with Wendy's burgers... yeah... you're welcome. And if you've been on a date on cold winter night.... and some ass soaked you with a full Big Gulp.... could have been me too. There was a time that I was a horrible human being...


What am I talking about, that still makes me laugh my ass off....

I'm a terrible person.

My post yesterday was talking about an awesome time we had, mostly at the expense of someone. And now I find myself caught between conflicting emotions. Yeah, that was great, so damn funny I don't have words for it. Yet at the same time, I think I can say for sure that every one of us at one time or another has gone to a party, let it all out, had a good time, only to find out later on that we completely embarrassed ourselves somehow. Everyones that ass sometime, right? Eh, maybe its just me. That's part of the reason I keep the manimal in the cage.... ever on the look out for the return of the ass!


Everyone of us has thought we made a real connection with someone, only to find out that it was the exact opposite, and they want to run as far from us as possible. Eh, maybe that's just me too, I don't know. That's a terrible feeling; its heartbreaking.

What I was going to say today, the point of all of this, was to remember that these people, the guy with the bad book, the nut job at the party.... well, they're people too. Imagine how you would feel if it were you in that position. It puts a whole different spin on the scenario doesn't it? If I have a strength at all these days its empathy, and that's born out of always trying to put myself in someone else's shoes, see things how they're seeing it, feel what they're feeling. Try it sometime, it'll change you for the better.


Of course.... I may have my stalker for the first time in years, so you have to find a way to tell someone. You can't keep having them ruin your parties or life stops being a party, you'll lose the reminders of how awesome life is. If your friends favorite Chinese Take Out has people skinning cats in the back alley, you should probably find a way to tell them that may be broccoli, but that aint chicken. And if they're putting all of their time, money, effort and dreams into a thing that will never catch on because it just completely sucks....


I just don't have the heart to hurt anyone these days. I've been there too many times myself to make someone else go through it too. Unless they're one of the "popular" people or "beautiful" people that have always crapped on the ones they deemed unworthy....

Those people make me LOVE showing just what an ASSHOLE I can be. Really.



But not when its a good person, no matter how crazy or misguided they may be.

But that doesn't mean they don't need help to find the right path. Myself included. So where's the balance? That's my question for the day. Hit me with your opinions, give me some answers.


Later People!

Join my fanpage John LaSota - Writer
Or our creative team's page The Mad Doser Presents



 
And if you need a healthy helping hand from a Personal Performance Consultant