but its SEXY!!! and.... you can't be on all the time.....

Ugh! I have a headache.

All I can say is thank God for coffee, sweet nectar of life!

Before I begin today I have to give a shout out to Mimz. I got an anonymous comment on last night's post and all it said was Mimz, and being curious I had to see what that was about, which is how it's done; they suckered me in. Unfortunately for our friend here, they didn't give enough information to go on and I don't know which of the many Mimz that comes up in Google search that you are, which leaves us a valuable lesson. Be specific. Make sure people know exactly what you want them looking at.

I also want to welcome our new Peruvian friends to out little club here. Nice to have you with us.

Last night I played my first competitive Darts match in a long time. When I stepped up to the board and saw that I was matched up against a woman I couldn't help but feel my chest puff up, the machismo flare. There was no way I was going to lose to a woman. I wouldn't say that she was good looking, but she definitely knew how to rock what she had... SEXY! 

Its a good thing for all of us out there to keep in mind, men and women alike. We can't all be good looking, but we can all add a little something to the way that we carry ourselves, a little swagger, that air of confidence that tells everyone "Yeah, I know you want me" no matter how we look that does in fact make people want us. You know what I'm talking about too. We've all had or known or seen at least one person at some point in our lives that we had to step back and say "I know they're not good looking at all.... but they're so damn SEXY.... I want them anyway...."

I think that's something we can all capture for ourselves, use it to capture someone for ourselves, no matter what came in the package we were born with.... sexy is so much more than good looking....

But I'm going off on a tangent here aren't I? Besides, this chick didn't have it like that, not at all. Just a lil sexy. So my first two throws are pretty nice... I'm feeling good, right? And then this chick unleashes hell and blows me right off the board. I'd like to say that I'm above that male need to prove that I'm a MAN baby, YEAH, that chauvinistic impulse that tells us that men are always better than the ladies in anything involving competition... but last night proved that I'm not.

Part of me was embarrassed, but at the same time... you can't be on all the time....

It forced a conversation that I had later in the evening with a woman on our team. Darts isn't like most other sports where man muscle is a factor. Women have better hand eye coordination than men do, if anything its something that fits them well, that they should excel at... yet every professional I can think of in the game is a man. All we could come up with as a reason for it is because the nature of how its played.... in the bar with the guys. I guess it's something to do to get away from the wife. Oddly, all of the pros I know of are also English....

I'm all over the place as I write this, I know. Its called a hangover; keeps interrupting my flow. I knew when I had reached my limit last night, but ended up having two more after that. What was I going to do? We were at this nice Irish bar in Rockville Center called Stingers... they really know how to take care of you in there. Here I thought the buy back was dead, but they really hooked it up. I give it my ringing endorsement, I'll be in there again and I hope you're there with me. It'll be a good time; we'll have a party.

Now it's my head that's ringing. That's what happens when the bartender hooks it up on a Monday night. Part of me should be embarrassed, there's a word for someone who gets wrecked in the bars on a Monday night; A DRUNK, but that's not what I'm talking about. I should be embarrassed for the state of today's blog.... but... you can't be on all the time....

Mariano Rivera is now the all time saves leader in baseball, greatest closer of all time. People have slobbered all over his nuts for years, but not me. I've always said, as great as he is (and he IS great), he's still over rated. I'm a HUGE Yankee fan, love the Yanks more than anything, they're my first love, so this isn't hating on my part. You can be great and still be over rated when the masses still slobber all over your balls without seeing your failures... think Reagan for Republicans... Clinton for Democrats... (I still don't believe elections actually exist), but Mo blows every other save against the Red Sox. He lost the 2001 World Series, there's no other way to put it, then blamed it on Brosius. Against the good teams he's an average pitcher, and that's a fact, the numbers back it up.

And when we talk greatness, real greatness, we judge it against the other greats, not the mediocre slobs who just showed up.... but hey.... you can't be on all the time....

Don't get me wrong though, the guy still is great...

As I'm writing this I've realized that I haven't done a very good job of showing off people that are ugly, yet still sexy. Most of everything that I've found is someone who is hot. But there's still a big difference between sexy and good looking.

I've also realized, as I've been writing this, that I'm not doing a very good job of actually writing anything. I'm off my game today, way off, and its degenerated into an excuse to post pictures of drunks and women... but then.... you can't be on all the time....

So here's a little something for the rest of us, those of us that aren't the beautiful people, to show that no matter how hot or sexy the rest of "THEM" are... in the end, we're all nasty in exactly the same way....

Now THAT... is SEXY!!!

Man... after that I don't even know what to say any more. So I'll leave you with a question and hope you all blow up the comments section here with you're answers... Who do you know that may not have the looks like these ladies, but is still every bit as sexy? What qualities do you think that entails? How does someone that might need a little help in that area pull it off? What can you tell us that helps get you going?

I'm interested to hear your answers....

Later People!

Peacocks DO fly! And.... it could always be worse.

Look at what I started! Maybe it's just the Reticular Activating System, but Peacocks are everywhere, and they're running wild!

This guy escaped from the Central Park Zoo the other day to perch himself up on a 5th floor window in Manhattan. Don't be the only one left on the block. Come hide with the herd and float with the flock....

I can't say what's going on with me, but I've been a special kind of asshole lately, snapping for no reason, getting on people's asses, it's not good. Whatever it is I constantly have to remind myself that it could always be worse. Now, I am a certified life coach and NLP practitioner, so I've done countless hours of research on positive thinking and all of that, and I do believe in it to an extent, but part of that is also appreciating what you have. Years ago I had gotten majorly depressed and lost about 35 pounds in a 2 week span, probably could have gotten really sick. What got me out of it was watching episodes of Party of Five, where every week Charlie got ball cancer or Neve Campbell got pregnant by some random stranger... or Scott Wolf found himself torn between smoking hot Amanda Beckett (Jennifer Love HugeTits) or that little boy he's had his eye on, and listening to The Cure over and over again.

Of course, if any of my buddies had come down into my basement dungeon apartment at the time and seen what I was up to they would have burned me on that. "Dude, what the fuck are you watching? And who the hell is crying on the radio? No wonder you want to kill yourself!" Still though, every week I would look at those people and say to myself, shit, it could always be worse... I could have ball cancer. And it's been a philosophy I've tried (though not always successfully) to keep in mind as I bang through life's daily bullshit.

That Lacy Chabert got really

fuckin hot, huh?

 Speaking of being that special kind of asshole, I was watching chicks fight again last night, MMA this time, if you can call it that. This one had a really hot body, and kept getting into these ridiculous positions that made you want to grab your shit. But every time she picked her head up her face looked like Warwick Davis.

I can't say there's anything about the idea of banging Willow that gets me hard. Could you imagine being in the middle of it with her, she looks up at you, lust in her eyes screaming "You ARE great!". I wouldn't know whether to shit or wind my watch.

But no matter what you're going through you always have to think about the things that you do have, and if that still has you sitting on the couch with your head in your hands like the Great Al Birdy crying "Oh God, I can't wake up!" remember... you could always be this guy!

And if that doesn't work just be happy that you don't have ball cancer. And if you DO have ball cancer, just be happy that it's not cock cancer. And if you've got cock cancer, accentuate the positive...

"Ah shit dude, you got Cock Cancer? That fucking sucks"
"Maybe so, but look of the SIZE of this thing now"

You see, it's just one big world of shit, and we're all wrapped up in it. There aint nobody clean! So it's all about making the best of a shitty situation, like this guy

Or maybe that's a woman, I can't tell. But it's a nice sunny day, she's got herself a seat in the shade, relaxing, and enjoying herself a beer. What more could a fella possibly want out of life? But if that's not enough for you, you're day can't possibly be worse than this guy's in the video you're about to watch and absolutely HAVE to see...

All I can say is better him than me. Shit, I don't know about you, but my day just got a whole hell of a lot better.

Special thanks to Scotty and Robinson for all of your help with today's post. As my closest friend from college so beautifully put it... you'll always be that special kind of asshole to me!

Don't be the only one left on the block
Hide with the herd
Float with the flock

Later people!